i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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