matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
