I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
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