she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Randomize
