Duck Duck Cougar?
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Randomize
