We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
