Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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