your parents love me but you hate me
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
