i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
