yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
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