I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
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