Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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