Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Randomize
