If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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