it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
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