I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
