We're like a lot better than the average bears
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Randomize
