She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Randomize
