my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Randomize