I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize
