Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Are my feet made of real feet?
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
