well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Still dying that you shit outside
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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