weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
