i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Randomize
