oh god the rape fog is back!
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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