it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
