Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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