I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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