If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
and you said cock pushups were impossible
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
