all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
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Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
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He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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