if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
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