i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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