my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Randomize