my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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