you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize