I want you more than these girls want KFC
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Randomize