my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
we're so committed to being not committed
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
