I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I think I have vodka in my lungs
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
