happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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