He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
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