I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
