found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
