You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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