3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I need to align my fucking chakras
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
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