so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize
