How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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