they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
