I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize