After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
