Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize